Aisophistic

Wednesday, April 15, 2009, Pursuit of Happiness @ 4:25 PM

As expected, SMU called and ask me why didnt i come for the interview. I simply said that im not interested and i would like to withdraw from the application. This is only SMU, NUS and NTU, i wonder how much more "pain", i have to go through. I know this may sounds stupid or in fact very stupid? Yes honestly, i felt the pinch and my heart aches looking at the email that SMU emailed me right after the call which i was so flabbergasted about. But now, everything had changed. Sometimes, you cant control the situation but you can always control the way you react to the situation. I had always inculcate that in myself since young. This time round, again, the situation made me change my mind. Things happen, again im saying this.

I know i cant be selfish and kept thinking for myself. Despite deep down inside i know that, getting that degree will definitely bring me a better future in time to come. Most said that why not study and get a more promising and better pay in 4 yrs time and join the workforce at the right time, when the economy is so much better. I totally see that point. But it somehow didnt trigger this sense of responsibility inside me towards my family.

And besides im taking another 4 more years? That is equivalent to 48 months. 48 months of no income and no way for me to help my parents. So you tell me, am i still very stupid then?

Ive talked to some people and some even said im very stupid. They rather have that opportunity instead to pursue a degree at the local uni. Then jolly well, i did the right thing. I gave up that seat to those deserving ones who wholeheartedly wants the seat so much. If i were to go for it now also, i will be half hearted err i think as of right now, 3/4 work and 1/4 study. In fact,this whole university was disturbing me since i started working at IRAS as almost 90% of the temp staff there are waiting for uni posting results! As for myself, i kept questioning myself whether i really want it badly like those people out there? I dont of course.

Every individual's expectation varies. To me, being able to know and feel that im shortlisted/considered/offered a seat at Singapore's Local University is already SATISFYING enough. Im already BLOODY proud of myself. Even my parents do. This also happened to me when i get to know back then, i was eligible for Anderson JC. One of the top jc! Just that feeling, it definitely become a motivation for myself. Im not purely a education-is-the-utmost-importance- kind of person.

Look at love himself, he is freaking more smarter than me and have a good GPA compared to me. He had even contemplate to further his studies and quit IBM to pursue a degree at the local uni. And look at where he is now, he is waiting to be called for SPF- Police Officer Training. Even though his GPA is a very good GPA to enter the local uni, he did gave a thought about it. But in the end, he'd rather work. He had his own reasons too. Like i do.

Life is totally unpredictable.

I guess at this age, we tend to "explore and try new things". We are still at the apprenticeship period. So i would like to wish all the best for those people out there and to those who matters the most to me, to be happy always in whatever you do in life.

To me, happiness is way more important than a piece of certificate.

Bear the risk. You want it, go for it.
Afterall, its your own pursuit of happiness.